Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
This house was built for laser tag.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
