I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize