haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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