TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
