she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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