Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
