okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
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Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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