Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
