Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
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U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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