no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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