this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
