I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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