I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Randomize
