Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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