good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize