things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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