I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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