so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
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