people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
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