For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
