Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Randomize
