Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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