Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
