I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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