Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
