He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
