I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
