4 words: hood of his car
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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