new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Randomize
