there was a trapeze. enough said
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Randomize
