I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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