...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
i dont even know how to be here
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Let's paint friendship bongs
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
