i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
