I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
