Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
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I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
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I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.