Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
So squirting runs in the family.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize