marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
