help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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