are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
