Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
literally had 100 drinks last night.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
