At least make sure they are 18
Why
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize