He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I currently don't understand fingers.
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