Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
