Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
