i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have beer where we have blood.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize