called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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