Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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