they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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