i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
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