she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
